Jya wereka umugabo wawe ko umutekereza

Mu rukundo, abantu bamenyereye ko abagabo ari bo bagomba gufata iya mbere bakabwira abagore babo amagambo aryoheye amatwi, nyamara siko biri. Umugore na we akwiye kwirekura agatera umugabo we imitoma.

Umugabo wawe ugukunda ukora uko ashoboye ngo agushimishe, ndetse akenshi ugasanga ahora akubita hirya no hino ashakisha imibereho. Nawe rero, ugomba kwerekana ko umushimira uko kukwitaho ukamwoherereza amagambo meza y’urukundo. Icyo aguhaye cyose cyaba gitoya cyangwa kinini, ugomba kumushimira kuko ntabwo uba uzi imvune yagize kugira ngo abigereho. Ibyo bizatuma arushaho kugukunda uko bukeye n’uko bwije.

Kugaragaza urukundo umukunda, bishobora kubaviramo ubucuti budashira kugeza mushaje. Hano hari amwe mu magambo yuje urukundo yatoranyijwe  na momjunction  ushobora kubwira umugabo wawe akumva ko afashwe nk’igihangange:

1. Numva ubuzima bwanjye bwose nabumara nibereye mu maboko yawe.
2. Ikintu kiza nungutse mu buzima ni wowe. Warakoze kumbera umufasha w’ibihe byose.
3. Umutima wanjye utera neza kubera wowe, izuba ryandasiye ndikesha wowe kandi impumeko yacu ni imwe.
4. Waba uzi igisobanuro cy’umunezero kuri njye? Kuri njyewe, umunezero ni ukugutegereza nyuma y’imirimo iruhije, naguteguriye amafunguro, nkakwitaho urwaye, nkanagutera inkunga mu gihe watsinzwe. Kuva ubu, dufite icyerekezi kimwe n’umutima umwe twembi.
5. Imana yakumpaye ngo dufatanye guhangana n’imihengeri y’ubuzima.
6. Nterwa ishema no gutemberana nawe. Nshimishwa cyane no kugenda nawe urugendo rurerure umfashe ukuboko.
7. Ngukunda uko uri kose, uko wabayeho kose ndetse n’uko uzamera kose.
8. Uhereye umunsi nabayeho umugore wawe, mbona naragize amahirwe yo kubaho ubuzima butangaje
9. Mu kivunge cy’abantu, amaso yanjye abona wowe gusa.
10. Nezezwa no kwitwa umugore na nyina w’abana bawe.

Dr. John Gottman ni Umunyamerika akaba ari Inzobere mu by’imitekerereze n’imyitwarire ya muntu, yaragize ati: “Burya ikintu kibi cyane mu rushako, ni ugufata umugabo wawe nk’umuterankunga aho kumubonamo umukunzi wawe mushyira hamwe”.